I don't know what it is but I tend to have a hard time believing people when they say they will miss me, or that they don't want me to leave or any of those other kind of things.

It's not that I believe people don't care... But to care enough to actually say "I'll miss you" and to really mean it? I don't know maybe I'm crazy, maybe I lack some kind of self esteem on some level... I don't know.

In all honesty there's just something about human closeness that I don't trust all out. Mostly I think I've just been burned one to many times by people. So like I have this kind of strange wall up that when anyone kind of cares I just don't buy it... I can't.

Blah but this all is like blah blah blah ramble ramble to you... *sigh* I digress...

Okay so today is my last day at my old job and I'm just happy to get it over with! I've been working Everyday since I guess Saturday and I'm just tired. Not to mention burned out and completely frustrated. This week has been just ARG!!!

Yeah that's totally my Definition for the week.... ARG, ARG ARG!!!! okay now I sound like a Pirate.... Lordy I'm sad =0p

So lets see interesting things I should tell you all about my last week...

Richard is playing this entire pity me thing to it's last fucking point... We got into this whole discussion yesterday about how I owe it to him to stay till the end of next week or at best work next Thursday and Friday (sooo not happening) He's doing this whole thing about how we had a verbal agreement. Supposedly I told him I would stay till the end of The Holidays so he didn't have to hire any new people. First off I NEVER told him not to hire anyone new, hell we needed a new person for at least a month now! Oh then I don't actually remember ever telling him I would stay through the Holidays! And if I did say this I would never quit, could never quit because there is ALWAYS a holiday... Oh I exaggerate but you know what I mean! Oh and the kicker to all of this was when he basically told me he likes me were on good terms but if I don't "help" him out will be on bad terms. And that he doesn't really want to have to tell others how he feels towards me if I don't fulfill my obligations... Okay needless to say he can kiss my natural black ass, and two no matter how nice I am. How much I try and please Just about everyone don't tell me what to do and never say I said something I know I didn't say.... So yeah he'll schedule me for next week, I wont show and I'll most likely get threatening messages left on my phone.... (the joy) But as for verbal agreements yes I did make one but it was that I would stay a year... Yes, I did my time and hell others wouldn't have kept there word... Trust me on that one, I know...

In other news don't text me and stuff I'm not getting them, my phone is kind of shutoff till I pay my bill (no worries) it should be back on by Thursday Friday at the latest. Oh but you can still call me I can answer my phone and junk I just can't call out (go figure)!

I'm hoping to get out of work earlier tomorrow, I really just wanna walk out sometime around 4 tomorrow... I know kind of wrong when I'm supposed to be there till 7 but honestly the last two days were super hard to get through. By the end of the day I wanted to chuck macaroons and challas at people. But then that would be wrong. So yeah can't do that...

Let's just hope my last shift goes ten times better...

Stale || Fresh

Leftovers...

A life time isn't aslong as it use to be - August 24, 2006
Heart bleeding in the end - May 05, 2006
Heads spinning - March 17, 2006
Kind of interesting - February 23, 2006
ten years in the making - February 19, 2006